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Workplace Society- The Office Party, or Trick or Treat
December 21st, 2007
Remember the line “I have to work with these people”?
That’s where the office party kicks in. The office party has a deserved reputation for being tricky and potentially dangerous. Add humans, alcohol, and whatever relationships are involved, and you have a recipe for practically anything.
The office party is like a society, all in one place at one time.
Most office parties couldn’t exactly be called orgies, but there are degrees. The office social club, if there is one, usually attracts the too-singles, their friends, and also has a habit of running the office parties. Some are run by middle managers, which adds an element of horror, but they tend to be staff based.
The basic scenario is an over-marinated worker with a boss. That’s an interesting form of career suicide. The mouth moves, and you get to guess what happens next. Not great as a character reference, potentially fatal as a work-related incident.
It does happen, just don’t let it happen to you.
It is possible to meet people, create new relationships, and generally enjoy this level of social interaction. Some people humanize, some become a bit less intolerant, largely because they think they have to, but they do.
Basic rules:
- Keep the mouth shut, unless it’s good news, or something completely harmless. Let someone else be the albatross around the party’s neck.
- Don’t mention any names. That will get around, and will be traced back to the source.
- Don’t get funny at anyone’s expense. Same deal. it has a way of returning to people.
- Be friendly, on principle, but stay alert.
- If there’s any unpleasantness, be well away from it.
The idea is to be able to talk to people afterwards. You might find a new position, or a romance, even, but office parties can get deadly.
If you see all the managers in one area, a large space in between them and the staff, take the hint. They’re not socializing, they’re taking advantage of free food. The standoffishness is a signal, don’t miss it.
There’s a theory that how people group themselves explains how an organization works. If you see managers happily hobnobbing with their staff, it’s a good place to work. If you see managers and staff conscientiously avoiding each other at an office party, the place is a possible minefield of relationships.
There are a few types who should be avoided at all costs:
- The Office Romeo, and the Office Tart, for health reasons.
- The Office Drunk, for aesthetic reasons.
- The Office Groveler/Backstabber, for any reason you feel like.
- The Office Gossip, for every reason you can think of.
At an office party, these guys are liabilities, and things usually get nasty. People are people, everyone has some oddity, but these are the wrong people. You’ll find within a day of walking in the door of any office that they’re also targets of real dislike from other staff, and often managers. If you want to work with everyone else, associating with them is more trouble than it’s worth.
The trick is that who you know will be considered to be what you know. Anyone who looks rational, doesn’t badmouth people, and knows how to shut up when the situation needs it, is a good start. You’ll find that a lot of managers are as bad as anyone in terms of social clangers, and they should be avoided, too. By all means, be friendly with the boss, but that doesn’t mean jump off a cliff with him.
The treat is that there are some people you can enjoy knowing. Any work situation, work or play, is about who you’re working with. Keep that in mind, and the rest is easy.
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