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Cutie New User

Joined: 23 Apr 2008 Posts: 8 Career Advice: +0/-0 Location: New York

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Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 7:05 pm Post subject: My Boss Is Making Me Sick |
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I hate getting up in the morning. I hate weekends because I know it’s only 2 days before I go back to the hell hole. I hate giving everything 110% when no one else cares. I’ll be fair and say that there are some things I like about this job, but lately, the bad has been outweighing the good.
There is nothing more depressing than working and being confined to a windowless room pushing around piles of paperwork.
My job wouldn’t be so bad — maybe even alright — if my boss weren’t such a brute most of the time. When I got hired, I was told about my work load which sounded very reasonable. But after I started working I noticed that my boss was verbally abusive to other employees but I did not worry about it because he had not started up with me yet.
Well now, after being there almost a year, the abuse started when she came back from her medical leave. I have gone from being a light smoker to a pack a day smoker. My nails are raw from biting them blood dry. I have asked her to please stop raising her voice with me and speaking to me in a condescending tone, but she always tells me that as a single mom I need my job and do what I am told to do. She has unrealistic demands. I started thinking what can I do, I could not quit, I had a family to care for and the rent was due.
What should do...if I quit and will have no income to support my family....I amso depressed about all of this that I think I am going to have to go on medication.
I thought I was doing well, my profession confidence was starting to come back but I can’t continue working where I’m constantly being ridiculed, around her cursing and her moody outbursts which even involve throwing folders around from time to time. |
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lexa10881 Expert

Joined: 24 Mar 2007 Posts: 1789 Career Advice: +1/-0 Location: Ohio

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Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 3:20 am Post subject: |
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I have a boss like this. Stand your ground...in a passive way. Like today, I had a showdown with mine, and rather than let her scream at me on the sales floor or stand there and feel the tears burst from my eyes, I gave her a pointed look, turned on my heel, and went about my merry way to tend to other work after a few sharp words of my own. She could either chase after me and look like an ass so she could yell at me more, or shut up and swallow her tongue that way...which was exactly what she did. We have an intermediate that causes a lot of chaos, and that is what we were fighting about. The intermediate has yanked me in a million different ways lately, and a big meeting is tomorrow and I am not prepared. When I went to her to tell her what I DID have done and ask how she wanted me to scramble to cover the rest, she blew and acted akin to your boss. Know that be it yours or mine, that kind of behaior is not acceptable!!!
My recommendation to you is, for now, try to handle your boss as I did mine today. In the meanwhile, start looking for a different job and get yourself outta there ASAP. You deserve better.
http://www.cvtips.com/bullies_at_work.html |
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Pauloz Expert

Joined: 02 Oct 2007 Posts: 341 Career Advice: +0/-0 Location: Sydney

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Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:01 pm Post subject: |
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cutie
Sounds like you've got a real animal there.
That's the exact description of a loser. That's a person who's going nowhere, and knows it.
You're also seeing a case of chronic frustration, another symptom.
Don't get into conflict with that state of mind, at all. This doesn't sound like a rational person, there's nothing to be gained.
As lexa says, you need to move on, and preferably upward.
It'd be worth your while to start planning a next move, anyway.
However, if possible, you can also move sideways in the organization, if an opportunity arises. That would get you out of that area, at least.
If it's a big organization, you can scout out possibilities regularly, and one of them will work, sooner or later. Try and develop relationships with other areas, anyone you know, (other managers or supervisors can be surprisingly helpful, although they won't want to get involved in another manager's territory) and you might get some help when they need people and know you're interested.
One word of advice. I'm a professional worrier myself. I've learned that it's what you worry about that gets the results, because that's where you usually put in more effort.
Transfer worry from the worrying about this idiot to worrying about finding a better job, and you'll find the other worries become less important, because they're less relevant.
In a way, it's distracting yourself, but it's also a pain killer, to some extent, and you can concentrate on getting something done, not just more worrying. |
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Cutie New User

Joined: 23 Apr 2008 Posts: 8 Career Advice: +0/-0 Location: New York

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GoodGradesNow New User

Joined: 27 May 2008 Posts: 6 Career Advice: +0/-0

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lexa10881 Expert

Joined: 24 Mar 2007 Posts: 1789 Career Advice: +1/-0 Location: Ohio

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