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Grolsch · Newbie Joined: 23 Sep 2009 Posts: 2 Career Advice: +0/-0

My (now) ex-wife and I were having marital troubles. At the root of these issues were too much time spent apart. We were both traveling for work - me a little and she quite a bit.

The company I was working for had a major reorganization. As part of this, I was promoted (YaY!) to a position with extensive travel (Uh-Oh). I new that if I stayed with the company, my marriage was over. I decided to leave the company and take a job which was home based.

Married life started to get better. Then, 3 months into the new job, THAT company had a reorganization. I was promoted (YaY!) to a job with extensive travel (Uh-Oh). Enter a new manager. I tried to explain to him that I took the job in large part because of the limited travel. In the spirit of team play, I told him that I would be willing to travel until other arrangements could be made - even if that meant a demotion and reduction in pay.

A year went by, and the company had another re-org. My soon-to-be ex-wife and I were in counseling, but there was no progress being made - breaking point.

In a last ditch effort to save the marriage, I made the decision to quit the job. Unfortunately, the marriage was not salvageable by this point. Divorce (not my choice btw, but a marriage takes 2 people). I decided to move back across the country to be near my family, and have been taking on consulting jobs ever since while I conduct my job search.

My question is: How do I address this during an interview? I am a very loyal person by nature, not a job-hopper - although it would appear that way if one were to just look at my resume. Do I just come out and tell the truth (lay it all on the line)? Or, is there some better way to handle this series of career decisions?

Pauloz · Posted: Thu Sep 24, 2009 1:30 am Post subject:

Grolsch

Yeah, I've never heard a good word about divorce from anyone, even the people who wanted to be divorced. This comes under the heading of "personal privacy", and you don't have to spell it out. You can stick to a bare bones approach, say that you were literally forced into the decision by a divorce-related series of events, and leave it at that. You can also quote yourself, regarding the non job hopping element.

Your CV, with the consulting work, will undo the damage of gaps to a large extent. It shows motivation and initiative. Actually, the situation, viewed as a series of forced moves, is pretty much self explanatory. Anyone with half a brain hearing the word "divorce" should be able to fill in the blanks.

I'd also suggest that the less complex the response in interviews, the better. The main point is your reluctance to quit, rather than the personal side. Stay positive in the response, and all should be well.

Grolsch · Newbie Joined: 23 Sep 2009 Posts: 2 Career Advice: +0/-0

Pauloz -

Thanks for the reply. I think that is very sound advice.

The first interview I had when I moved back, I decided that I would make travel the focal point of why I chose to leave those companies rather than my personal life. That strategy failed. The feedback I got from people inside the company (I had a friend who worked there) was that my "story" seemed disingenuous. Although it was the truth, interviewers could see it was not the whole truth.

But your strategy is one I have been leaning towards, and it's good to hear that at least someone else thinks along the same lines. Unfortunately, it's a situation few wish to discuss, and I have found it difficult to find sound advice.

Thanks again.

Pauloz · Posted: Thu Sep 24, 2009 2:52 am Post subject:

Glad to help, mate. Hope it works out for you.

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